FBI Launches Task Force to Protect Tesla

If there's any doubt that the United States is rapidly descending into oligarchy, a new move by Donald Trump's FBI might clear the air. After recording at least 80 separate incidents of vandalism or arson against Tesla vehicles and dealerships, the FBI has announced the creation of a brand new task force to investigate property damage inflicted on the EV company owned by our new oligarch-in-chief Elon Musk. It's not yet known how big the taskforce is or what actions it will be investigating, as non-destructive protests at Tesla dealerships are widespread. Though various news outlets have decried the property […]

Mar 25, 2025 - 19:50
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FBI Launches Task Force to Protect Tesla
As protests against Tesla gain widespread traction, the FBI is starting to crack down on nonviolent political dissent.

If there's any doubt that the United States is rapidly descending into oligarchy, a new move by Donald Trump's FBI might clear the air.

After recording at least 80 separate incidents of vandalism or arson against Tesla vehicles and dealerships, the FBI has announced the creation of a brand new task force to investigate property damage inflicted on the EV company owned by top Trump operative Elon Musk.

It's not yet known how large the task force is or what actions it will be investigating, as non-destructive protests at Tesla dealerships are gaining traction.

Though various news outlets have decried property damage against Teslas as "violent attacks," it should be noted that no humans have yet been injured as people take desperate action against Musk's pet brand. That hasn't stopped president Donald Trump from calling vandals "terrorists" in part of his ongoing attempt to expand the federal definition of "domestic terrorism" — a common political move in authoritarian states.

"The swarm of violent attacks on Tesla property is nothing short of domestic terrorism," said Attorney General Pam Bondi last week. "We will continue investigations that impose severe consequences on those involved in these attacks, including those operating behind the scenes to coordinate and fund these crimes," she continued, painting a vivid picture of underground terrorist cells working in secret, rather than masses of ticked off retirees lashing out over their next social security check.

Though the task force is presumably a move by Trump to keep Musk comfortable as he rips through the federal government, the FBI being used for political means isn't a rare exception under a rogue administration, but the rule. Today's vandalism task force follows a long history of the US government throwing its weight behind business interests over people in times of political turmoil.

Take for example, the 1914 Ludlow Massacre, when miners striking for better rights were gunned down alongside their families by National Guardsmen working together with corporate mercenaries.

The years following Ludlow would see hundreds of strikes erupt across the country, like the 1919 Steel Strike, when hundreds of thousands of steel and coal workers protested across the country after peaceful attempts at labor reform were shut down. The federal and state governments responded with brutal violence that culminated in the Palmer Raids — also known as the first red scare — when nearly 10,000 workers, activists, and immigrants were detained, beaten, and deported for disrupting the massive steel and coal industries.

A more recent example was the Dakota Access Pipeline protest of 2016, when Native American activists and their allies hoping to block a potentially disastrous oil project were attacked and arrested by North Dakota state police and corporate security guards, as FBI agents infiltrated protestors' camps to carry out "military-style counterterrorism measures."

Nearly ten years later, the state's legal machinery continues to pay off for the oil corporation. A recent finding by a potentially biased jury has ordered nonprofit Greenpeace to pay Energy Transfer Corporation $660 million for defamation related to the protests — ensuring future protestors will think twice before going up against big oil.

So while an FBI task force to protect car dealerships may seem absurd, it's really just another page in the long book of state-protected commerce — albeit the most desperate.

More on Tesla protests: Crowd Cheers as TV Shows Cybertrucks Burning After Being Hit by Molotov Cocktails

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